Friday, July 1, 2011

Adulthood is...having to buy your own couch...

This has been an AMAZING year. It's only halfway through and I've already seen God do so much in and around me. It's truly exciting. God has revealed a lot of vital things to me in these past 6 months.

For instance. In this year I have come to the FREEING discovery that my life doesn't revolve around finding a man and getting married. Thank God for that because..if it did I'd be totally failing at life lol. Seriously tho. This may be common sense to everyone else but boy has it set me free! I always "knew" that I'd get married and have kids right out of college and that would be my life. I'd never have to worry about transitioning into adulthood...my man would take care of providing for us and managing all the "scary" details and our life together would be blissful.

When life didn't exactly pan out that way, I grew increasingly more bitter. By the grace of God opening my eyes, I now know, I was gravely mistaken to plan my life as if it revolved around my wedding day. The fact is...who really cares that my life didn't pan out the way I planned!? Surprise, surprise. What's the big deal!? God NEVER promised that my life would unfold in MY time frame or even that I'd get married period. And let me tell you, that thought would have scared the pants off of me last year. But to be perfectly honest. I like that I'm making my own way and that I've been given the experience of depending on God alone for my leadership into adulthood. That is something that girls who get married right off the bat or are in godly relationships do not have the opportunity to experience.

I have been trying my best to take responsibility with my life ever since this sobering discovery. I admit it is hard, and it is scary being a family of ONE. However, I WILL NOT sit around and wait to get married to start living my life. What an insanely stupid thought! I can't believe I had it once. It's so ridiculous. No. I will pursue my passions. Pursue God. I will set goals for my own life and work towards them, apart from any man. I'm not a feminist...I've just seen the light regarding irresponsibly putting all my hope into marriage and expecting a man to do everything for me.

God has given me a passion for the Disney Parks. I fully intend on pursuing that passion and doing the best job I can for God's glory. That's my plan. If I'm married or not...doesn't matter. I'm honestly not worried about it. I am setting up shop...just me, myself, and I. Sure it would be nice to have a husband to lead me, make all the hard decisions, plan with me, pick out furniture and curtains with me, build a home with me, etc. But that's not the way my life has unfolded. So what. My life is killer!! I love it so much! God has blessed me with SO MUCH.

Even with this recent realization, it honestly had not yet occurred to me that eventually I would need to BUY all the items that most girls are GIVEN for their wedding and pick out with their husband when they get married. Things like a blender, utensils, a vacuum, a table, and a couch. I came to this epiphany a few days ago. I feel like that is yet again another thing that it would be silly to wait on. I am 24 now. Life is in full force. It's time to pick out a couch (so to speak) and settle in somewhere. Sure it is SO NOT FAIR that us single ladies get the shaft and actually have to buy our own stuff. But we'll be stronger for it in the long run. (Though I would totally be open to starting a revolution to make a mandatory tradition for single women over the age of 23 to be thrown a party where practical gifts are given ;P)

So, I have a long term plan. I'm buying a dog. I'm setting goals. I'm pricing appliances and furniture. I have ambitions. I am saving money like crazy for the first time in my life. I've never had that kind of drive or self-control about anything before. It's incredible.

I just gotta say that to the world of girls who are waiting around for prince charming...get off your butt and live your life, ladies. Stop waiting for prince charming and start living it up, just you and your Savior...plan as if it's just you and Him forever. If you're not content with that thought, you need to seriously evaluate your Christianity. I did. And here's what I learned: It's not about your MARRIAGE. It's about your LIFE and glorifying God with it. If He chooses to bring you a companion. So be it. But no where does it say in the Bible that your prince charming is on His way.

Put down the fluffy, romantic, christian self-help books, turn off A Walk to Remember and Michael Buble, and open your eyes to the life that God has waiting for you. It's truly wonderful when you do.

God has a plan for your life as a single person. Ask Him and He will show you the way! You're not helpless. "Man up."

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11

These words are from the song "Lead Me" by Sanctus Real:

"So Father, give me the strength
To be everything I'm called to be
Oh Father, show me the way
...Won't you lead me"

They are from the point of view of a husband asking God to help him lead his family. But I think of them in another way. I am often overwhelmed by "going it alone" in this crazy world. I feel often like I don't even know where to start or what to do when it comes to the many things that go into adulthood. But God is FAITHFUL to lead me! I must remember that!! It is as much exciting as it is scary because in all my fears there are opportunities for God to blow my mind with His careful guidance in my life.

So I leave you with this ladies:
"Faithful is He that called you, who also will do it."
1 Thessalonians 5:24

So what are you waiting for? Don't be stupid, people. Don't be stupid.

3 comments:

  1. amen. this is why i plan to get my own place (likely with other gals, not actually my own)

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  2. Great post, Jenny. Sounds like it has been an amazing year for you. Love hearing how God is working in your life. As a woman who didn't get married until I was 26 — and really didn't date anyone through college or until I met Josh when I was 25 — I can relate to what you're saying and totally affirm your convictions on this. Everyone's story and journey looks diffent but you nailed it: "It's not about your marriage. It's about your life and glorifying God with it."

    But what's this about a family of one - you have an amazing family! From what I can tell ;-) And in the body of Christ, family is so much more than mothers and fathers and husbands and children... As you step out in faith where God is calling and leading you, I'm confident He will bless you with incredible family wherever you are.

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  3. Thanks, Jen! Your words were very encouraging :D

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